Growing up in Louisa – Moms Matter!
Weekly feature . . . by Mike Coburn
Over the years I have written about many different kinds of memories. One that arose from the recesses of my mind occurred when I was watching TV and saw “Hi, mom,” mouthed by a professional football player who was sitting on the bench. The sound did pick up the comment, but I knew what he had said by reading his lips. You see, when he saw the TV camera was focused on him, the first thing out of his mouth was the motherly greeting. I know that it is not a rare phenomenon, but rather that it is so very common. It is an impulsive reaction for so many of us creatures. We think of mom, first. There are many that continue long after mom’s passing, to try and please her. We all want mom’s approval, and we want to do this, or that, for our mothers. Moms are forever, important to us.
It’s not rare that a person under duress would call out for ‘mom’ or in some countries, ‘mum,’ whenever difficulties arise, including our dying breaths upon our death beds. I’ve heard war stories where a wounded soldier cries out from his foxhole for his mother to save him when he perceives that he is facing death. The call is usually to one’s own mother, but there are times that even the ‘mother of Christ’ is invoked by religious teaching. Are we to believe that such action is an inherent sign of our belief that mother can really intercede? It is it just a ‘throwback’ to former times when mom would rush to kiss the boo-boo? Are our mothers a type of ‘home,’ and a shelter wherein we find final and complete comfort? Ah, there is no comfort like a mom’s embrace.
There is no question that our mothers are the nearest and dearest to our hearts. It makes sense. After all, they were the first to care for us. They provided our nurture and daily needs. They fed us, wiped our behinds, bandaged our wounds, dried our tears and encouraged us in times of trouble. They understood us, but more importantly, they had an everlasting love for us. Their love had no limits. Neither did their forgiveness.
With all this sentimental reasoning about Mother’s Day there is another segment of the world that aims to use this ‘holiday’ as a marketing ploy, thus instigating commerce that would encourage the flow of greenbacks into their coffers. The candy people, the flower people, the jewelry folks, and the favorite restaurants, all rush to help clueless husbands and off-springs find a worthy mean of celebrating. How nice. If we spend enough money then mom will see that we love her. That’s the idea. Really? Undoubtedly we should find ways to let her know that she more than matters, but is often the power that keeps the wheels turning. It’s nice to eat out together so long as family members don’t have their faces in their respective smart phones. Insincerity is too easily read, especially by mom. Doing something without having your heart in it will likely cause more pain than comfort.
So come on people. I suspect two ideas might nearly mean more to mom. 1) Spend some time with her. I mean, really listening to her and not give the appearance of needing to be someplace else. 2) Help her. Find the nastiest chores needing attention and do them without her asking or even knowing you’re on the job. When she goes to take care of the dreaded work, she’ll see someone cares. She may have been hinting on other ideas, too, but we guys are often clueless.
Just know that we can never tell her too often of her importance, or send her too many cards. We should include her in our important events as we can. Back when I was growing up I knew a few elderly grandmothers who simply just sat and rocked alone. They often spoke of their children, but rarely saw them. Of course, kids grow up and have their lives and are amid raising children of their own. They get lost in working on careers, but they must remember that they got to this point thanks to mom. An idea I had for those who can, is to pick a day every month, or every quarter, for a mom ‘date night.’ You guys should have long ago set up one of those for your wife, too, you know. Once a week with honey, and once a month with mom, will add so much value to their lives and yours. It will draw you closer and show her that she still counts. If you can’t work that in another message is sent. Mothers are astute as reading messages sent and not sent.
The man who still has his mother and sees that his kids respect and celebrate her, is already blessed. I remember being told once many years ago that “If you want to be treated like a King, treat your wife like a Queen.” That’s merely the golden rule restated, but it works. You don’t need a Dale Carnegie to tell you these simple things. Moms everywhere have already influenced the lives of their families, often at a high personal cost. Always remember, mom took care of you when it wasn’t convenient. Mother’s Day is a special day to remind you of this special person and give you opportunity to reach out and thank her.
Happy Mother’s Day, Sunday, May 14, 2017.